just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
