You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
