my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize