I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
