I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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