The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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