just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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