At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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