So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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