Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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