shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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