I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
