More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
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