She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
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