Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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