If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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