I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I just sucked dick on a ferry
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
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