I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Randomize
