it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
