There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize