My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your dad took our porno
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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