chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
