Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize