I have demons in me.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
