Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
