she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I cut my penus on the lid.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
