The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
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He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
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You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
We need to feng shui this bitch.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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