On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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