Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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