He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
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