what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
