Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize