That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
