My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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