Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Of course I have a pirate flag
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
