Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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