He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
