Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
