How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
