and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize