Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
