i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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