Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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