dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize