i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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