It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize