Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Randomize