just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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