yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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