Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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