So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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