My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
